We all live with fear. For some of us it is a voice on the periphery, for others it is a paralysing force.
"Pushing through the fear is less frightening than living with the underlying fear that comes from a feeling of helplessness", is what is stated in "Feel the Fear and do it anyway" from Susan Jeffers.
Over the next few weeks I want to examine various aspects and tips of this book which I found both practical and inspirational.
She categorises Fears in:
Level 1: Those that happen (ex ageing) and those requiring a decision
Level 2: inner states of mind (rejection, vulnerability)
Level 3: I cant handle it
Of all the fears we know, the one thing we need to trust is our ability to handle whatever comes our way.
We must make a companion out of fear, especially as at the end of the day apparently 90% of what we fear never happens! Seems a strange way to live one's life!
She uses a pain to power charter where you take responsibility and most importantly handle the chatterbox within.
Taking action is where the power lies as it takes us away from the feeling of being a helpless victim and being aware is already half the battle.
"Ships in harbour are safe, but that is not what ships are built for"John Shead.
If we live in fear, of change, of not being good enough, of humiliation, and loss we only live half a life and that is not what we are built for.
The truth is, we all feel that fear and the only way to get through the fear of doing, is to do.
Susan suggests tackling a fear a day to expand our horizon and experiencing how liberating it is.
She gives practical tips such as:
1. Listing all the pay -offs
2. Being aware of the options and making it a game to de-dramatise. "Angels fly because they take themselves lightly", she suggests playing with life instead of fighting it. Doesnt that already feel good?
3. Notice what you are saying to yourself ( I cant, I should, its not my fault)
4. List available choices that could change unpleasant situations into pleasant ones, play the change your point of view game. What would another suggest?
5. Focus on the good things and not the bad
6. Commit to spending one week without criticising or complaining
Some things are within our circle of influence and others not, they just happen and you can complain and resist and fight them, or just go with the flow and say YES to your universe
More next time about dealing with the chatterbox within, for now Let's make it happen and start on the road to self-empowerement by befriending our fears...
