If alright with you, dear followers and occasional blog readers, I shall put the "8 steps to discovering and harnessing your motivation" on hold to go with the seasonal flow!
End of December, under a very snowy Potsdam sky,the time is right, before moving on to defining goals and resolutions for 2011, to first take stock for 2010.
A friend of mine shared with me an exercise called "My best year yet" and though I am very sorry to not be able to locate the direct source, I would like to share it with you as I found it very valuable. Why? Because we learn from the past. That is actually part of a saying which really resonnates with me: Learn from the past, plan for the futur and live in the present!
So get your notebooks out and answer the following:
1. So what were your personal successes over the last year? What are you satisfied with? Proud of?
2. What regrets do you have? What did you not achieve that you had wanted to?
3. What did you learn?
4. Which people counted for you the most in the past year? Rank them and decide if there is anything you would want to change next year.
5. Based on the above, make at least 10 resolutions for the coming year.
Good luck!And a very happy new year to you all!
May it bring you fun and friendship, love and laughter, health and hope and passion and purpose!
Let's make it happen!
Tuesday 28 December 2010
Wednesday 15 December 2010
Step 3: Determine WHY do you want that change?
In other words: what is your motivation? In order to step outside our comfort zone and do something differently we need to be very clear on what it will bring us. This is of course highly subjective but crucial in gathering the energy and the strength that will see us over the hurdle.
So what will being (...) bring you? Write it all down. Just let it flow, the first reason, the second, the third, with no judgement in between. When you write freely, fast, your conscious mind is held busy with the physical writing which lets the subconscious get a chance to express itself.Our conscious brain is the one which analyses and at times sabotages our creative ideas before they are even given a chance, so we need to get around him! Ever wondered at the marvellously creative ideas you get when walking or gardening? It is basically the same reason, the conscious mind is too busy repeating its movements to sabotage the potentially wild, free, different thoughts which may emerge from our subconscious! You must keep asking. The first reasons will most likely be the ones you know you should change for but not neccessarily your core motivation. And that is the one which matters, that is the one for which you are prepared to put up with some hardship.
We are creatures of habit and it takes a lot of willpower to break the habit and venture out into unknown territory. You will only take consistent action if something important to you is at stake.
So WHAT will making this change in yourself bring you? If we are talking about being for example fitter or slimmer (this is just an example for the sake of clarity, you can use this process for ANY change): your DESIRE to be slimmer has to be stronger than your desire for that piece of chocolate cake. You will be the same, the cake will be the same, the only thing that will change will be your focus, your drive, your willpower concerning your reaction to that piece of cake.
This new you then becomes a MAGNIFICENT OBSESSION because you know it fits with who you really are.
In motivational coaching we talk about:
AWAY GOALS which are associated with moving away from a state which causes us distress. It is usually associated with fear or pain. We will do soemthing out of fear of the consequence. So in our previous example, not eating the cake out of fear of staying fat and dying of a coronary disease.
TOWARDS GOALS on the other hand are associated with pleasure. Moving towards being a slimmer, fitter you, feeling great about ourselves, in control.
So once we have a deeper understanding of WHY this change is important to us, WHAT it will bring us. Once we have the fuel to power our motivation, we need to take a little psychological break to examine some beliefs we may hold on the topic!
For those of you reading this now, whether you celebrate Xmas or not in your corner of the world: I wish you a wonderful festive season, full of sharing and caring and wish you all the very best for 2011. May you accomplish all your goals!
I will be back after Xmas to accompany you as you examine your beliefs!
Let's make it happen!
So what will being (...) bring you? Write it all down. Just let it flow, the first reason, the second, the third, with no judgement in between. When you write freely, fast, your conscious mind is held busy with the physical writing which lets the subconscious get a chance to express itself.Our conscious brain is the one which analyses and at times sabotages our creative ideas before they are even given a chance, so we need to get around him! Ever wondered at the marvellously creative ideas you get when walking or gardening? It is basically the same reason, the conscious mind is too busy repeating its movements to sabotage the potentially wild, free, different thoughts which may emerge from our subconscious! You must keep asking. The first reasons will most likely be the ones you know you should change for but not neccessarily your core motivation. And that is the one which matters, that is the one for which you are prepared to put up with some hardship.
We are creatures of habit and it takes a lot of willpower to break the habit and venture out into unknown territory. You will only take consistent action if something important to you is at stake.
So WHAT will making this change in yourself bring you? If we are talking about being for example fitter or slimmer (this is just an example for the sake of clarity, you can use this process for ANY change): your DESIRE to be slimmer has to be stronger than your desire for that piece of chocolate cake. You will be the same, the cake will be the same, the only thing that will change will be your focus, your drive, your willpower concerning your reaction to that piece of cake.
This new you then becomes a MAGNIFICENT OBSESSION because you know it fits with who you really are.
In motivational coaching we talk about:
AWAY GOALS which are associated with moving away from a state which causes us distress. It is usually associated with fear or pain. We will do soemthing out of fear of the consequence. So in our previous example, not eating the cake out of fear of staying fat and dying of a coronary disease.
TOWARDS GOALS on the other hand are associated with pleasure. Moving towards being a slimmer, fitter you, feeling great about ourselves, in control.
So once we have a deeper understanding of WHY this change is important to us, WHAT it will bring us. Once we have the fuel to power our motivation, we need to take a little psychological break to examine some beliefs we may hold on the topic!
For those of you reading this now, whether you celebrate Xmas or not in your corner of the world: I wish you a wonderful festive season, full of sharing and caring and wish you all the very best for 2011. May you accomplish all your goals!
I will be back after Xmas to accompany you as you examine your beliefs!
Let's make it happen!
Monday 6 December 2010
Step 2: Determine WHAT it is that you want
Welcome back! On we go to step 2: discovering and harnessing your motivation in order to bring about the changes you want in your life!
Now we have the book, its time to commit to paper. But what is it that you want? This is often less obvious than it seems. We are usually a lot clearer on what we don't want. However if you shoot at nothing you are very likely to hit it. So aim for something, be bold, be assertive, don't start with all the reasons why you can't. Start with claiming what you do want. Bear one important point in mind: the only person you can change is yourself so there is no point having as goal that you want someone else to do something. This goal has to be about you: I want to be...(happier, thinner, fitter, a better person, mother, brother, friend, fulfilled at work, in balance...etc)
Then run a reality check. On a scale of 0 to 10 with 10 being total satisfaction, where are you now regarding that goal? Make a diary entry in your notebook.Now we are talking. Our goal may not yet be as specific as it needs to be but it has a name.
How badly do you want that change? This is the key point regarding your motivation. Give it some proper thought. We say a lot of things, but how many are we really prepared to commit to? We are setting ourselves up for success and it really does not amount to rocket science. The recipe is simple: your desire for the change has to be stronger than what you are currently doing.
In order to get something that you dont have now, you are going to have to do something differently. "If you do what you always did, you will get what you always got". Sounds straight forward. But in order to change you are going to have to do something new, do it differently.You are going to have to take a step outside of your comfort zone and will need all the motivation you can muster to fuel you through.
So are we now clear on WHAT you want? WHERE you stand now? And HOW badly you want it? And is all of this commited to the notebook in visible letters?
Then next week we will move on to step 3: discovering your motivation: WHY do you want this change?
Happy brainstorming. Let's make it happen!
Now we have the book, its time to commit to paper. But what is it that you want? This is often less obvious than it seems. We are usually a lot clearer on what we don't want. However if you shoot at nothing you are very likely to hit it. So aim for something, be bold, be assertive, don't start with all the reasons why you can't. Start with claiming what you do want. Bear one important point in mind: the only person you can change is yourself so there is no point having as goal that you want someone else to do something. This goal has to be about you: I want to be...(happier, thinner, fitter, a better person, mother, brother, friend, fulfilled at work, in balance...etc)
Then run a reality check. On a scale of 0 to 10 with 10 being total satisfaction, where are you now regarding that goal? Make a diary entry in your notebook.Now we are talking. Our goal may not yet be as specific as it needs to be but it has a name.
How badly do you want that change? This is the key point regarding your motivation. Give it some proper thought. We say a lot of things, but how many are we really prepared to commit to? We are setting ourselves up for success and it really does not amount to rocket science. The recipe is simple: your desire for the change has to be stronger than what you are currently doing.
In order to get something that you dont have now, you are going to have to do something differently. "If you do what you always did, you will get what you always got". Sounds straight forward. But in order to change you are going to have to do something new, do it differently.You are going to have to take a step outside of your comfort zone and will need all the motivation you can muster to fuel you through.
So are we now clear on WHAT you want? WHERE you stand now? And HOW badly you want it? And is all of this commited to the notebook in visible letters?
Then next week we will move on to step 3: discovering your motivation: WHY do you want this change?
Happy brainstorming. Let's make it happen!
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